We Break Down Ben's Statement

Around 6PM,Steelers QB Ben Rothlisberger made a statement regarding his legal matters.. We here at Grumblings And Rumblings have read the statement,And ready to break it down for what Ben was actually saying..

Ben Roethlisberger's Statement

"I'd like to begin by expressing gratitude to the thorough investigation process in Georgia.
 :I am so happy My stupid ass did not get charged!!!


The prosecutor's decision not to bring charges, I know without a doubt, is the right conclusion. I don't intend to discuss any details related to the events of Georgia. I'm happy to put this behind me and move forward.

 Let me get my checkbook out AGAIN,God I am a moron....

"I'm truly sorry for the disappointment and negative attention I brought to my family, my teammates, coaches, the Rooneys and the NFL. I understand that the opportunities I have been blessed with are a privilege, and much is expected of me as the quarterback of the Pittsburgh Steelers.

 Ever since my face met a car windshield me have brain owie...

I absolutely want to be the leader this team deserves, valued in the community and a role model to kids. I have much work to do to earn this trust. And I'm committed to improving and showing everyone my true values.
  I am going to actually do what I am paid to do,Win games,And not make a gigantic asshole out of myself..

"I am excited to get back to work with my teammates, and I'm more determined than ever to have a great season. I intend to make my family, friends and Steeler nation proud on all fronts. Thank you. God bless."

I sure hope my team mates do not take away my call of duty time after practice,And I'm sure ALL Steeler fans will love me once I through 4 td's..
  I promise you I will not have bathroom sex anymore,..